 Couric
to pull first Iraq tour
This is a rush
transcript from an interview with our Middle East correspondent, Bryce
Macombe. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
... ... ...
Walter Jefferies (HHWT News Anchor): Good morning Bryce.
Bryce Macombe (Baghdad): Well, it's Baghdad so I don't know about
'good' but it is morning. That's for sure. What?!
You guys can't figure out the time change? It's not bad enough I gotta
sleep in Kevlar and diapers? Now I gotta drag my ass outta bed at 4AM
for a fluff piece?!
WJ: Sorry. Sorry about that, Bryce. We're, all of us here very
appreciative of your sacrifices, but I wouldn't call Katie Couric
visiting Ira... Wait. Wait. Diapers? Why're you
sleeping in diapers?
BM: Burrito night in the Greenzone, Walt. You do not
want to make a rush visit to the latrine at 1am after 250 marines
stormed that beachhead. Talk about IED! Whoa! Trust
me on this one, Walt.
WJ: Okay, okay, Bryce. That's fine. Listen. What's the word on the
ground about Katie Couric's first visit to Iraq? Is there excitement
over it? Are people excited?
BM: Very much, Walt. I tell ya, everyone is looking forward to the
reinforcements her division will bring. Ever since the surge started
everybody here has been pulling double patrol duty and working 18
hour...
WJ: Bryce! Bryce! Wait a minute! What do you mean her division?
She's going to anchor the CBS Nightly News from Baghdad, isn't she?
BM: What? Nooo, Walt. Her National Guard division was called up. Yeah,
she's a weekend warrior! The fightin' 42nd. Well... now she'll be a
fifteen month warrior, but that's what they've been training for all
these years, right?
WJ: You're kidding me! She's going to Iraq as a soldier?!
How is that possible? What could she possibly do there?
BM: Yeah Walt! That's right! She's special ops! The commanders I've
talked to are pretty tight lipped about mission details. Something
about 'infiltrating insurgent strongholds' with 'disarming perkiness'
or something. Pshhh! I don't know. She does have killer legs though,
Walt! Am I right or am I right, huh?!
WJ: Yes she does have great legs, you are right about that Bryce.
Listen, we have to go but one last question. If she's gonna be serving
in Iraq for the next year, any word on her replacement in the anchor
chair at CBS?
BM: Ummm...Ohhh. Yeah, I see what your drivin' at big guy. Yeah sure.
Like you gotta prayer. Pffh! Keep dreamin' Walty!
I've seen your calves. No chance, baby!
WJ: Well, alright. Okay then Bryce. Good talking to you. Stay safe over
there.
BM: Yeah. Sure. Hey! Could you send some Desenex 'cause I'm really
startin' to chafe...
WJ: We'll get right on that, Bryce. HHWT News signing off.
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