 Sun's
severe swelling stage seems somewhat survivable, solar scientists say
The
following is a rush transcript from an interview with our Senior
Science correspondent, Bryce Macombe. This copy may not be in its final
form and may be updated.
Walter Jefferies (HHWT News): And now let's check in with our Senior
Science correspondent Bryce Macombe, who's in Naples, Italy with Dr.
Roberto Silvotti of the Observatorio Astronomico di Cap....
[live video image – Bryce Macombe on surface of
Sun]
Bryce Macombe (Photosphere, Sun): [interrupting] Uhhh, hold
on there
Walt! Little change of plans.
WJ: You're not in Naples?
BM: Obviously, Walt. Silvotti backed out at the last minute so we
decided to go straight to the source. WJ: So, then, where are
you Bryce?
BM: Surface of the Sun, Walt.
WJ: [stunned] The surface of the Sun?!
BM: Yup. Yeah it took us a little longer to get
here than we figured. Somethin' about a 250 mile per sec headwind the
whole way. I dunno. The pilot said we'd make up for it on the way back,
though.
WJ: [still stunned] You're on the surface... of the
Sun. You're reporting from the
surface of the Sun.
BM: [confused] Do you not have video, Walt? [looking off camera] Does
he not got our video?
WJ: No, no, no we got the video. I just, I, I... Bryce, how did you get
there?
BM: Well I did have to call in a few favors from my
week at NASA. But you'd be surprised how far a case of twelve year old
single malt goes over Walt. The hard part was finding it in those
minibar size bottles so they can slip it past launch secu...
WJ: [interrupting] Okay, okay, Bryce. Fine. So you're
actually on the
surface of the Sun.
BM: Well... [slight chuckle] not actually.
WJ: Ah, I thought not. Very clev...
BM: [interrupting] The Sun is a gaseous ball, Walt. The
“surface” you see is actually just the layer from
which light, after being created in the core as high energy gamma-ray
photons and scattering around inside for over a million years, finally
escapes as a nice happy warm greenish-yellow sun ray. Then it flies for
eight or so minutes through the interplanetary medium and ends its life
warming your lily-white ass on the sands of the French Riviera.
WJ: Listen, Bryce, I didn't mean...
BM: Ah-ah-ah c'mon now, don't deny it Walt. I've seen the pictures.
Dimples and all. [discretely] And just between you and me, big guy, a
wax job is sorely in order my friend.
WJ: Um. Okay. Well I... anyway. So... what's the surface of the Sun
like up close then, Bryce?
BM: Sorta like a sauna... Only hotter. Much. Hotter.
[awkward silence]
WJ: So, that's it? The surface of the sun is hot.
BM: Pretty much, yeah.
WJ: How about the recent astronomical report of planets still orbiting
their post-red giant phase parent star?
BM: [sarcastically] What? So even though five
billion years from now the Sun may expand in size nearly enveloping
earth's orbit, the planet may remain intact after this phase albeit as
a chard, smoldering astro-s'more with no life, water or light metals of
any kind? There's no story there, Walt. Our viewers want sex and
violence, cop car chases and celebrity court cases. The whole
feel-good, underdog, David-and-Goliath, come-from-behind, can-do spirit
thing just doesn't bump our numbers. The sun's hot. We'll fry. End of
story. Wake me when Britney's caught topless again.
WJ: You travel a hundred million miles from the Earth to the Sun and
that's all you have to say about it?
BM: Well c'mon, Walt. With these frequent flyer miles I'll be travelin'
free for a decade. It was a no-brainer. Hey! You wanna play Saint
Andrews this weekend? We need a fourth! I'll fly you out there?!
WJ: Okay that'll be fine, Bryce. That was Senior Science
Correspondent
Bryce Macombe from the surface of the Sun.
BM: You in Dubya-Jay?!
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